An Apple a Day

I'm back and better than ever. Kudos to Apple for the super-speedy service. I called them one day, received a box in the mail the next day, sent my laptop in the next day, and got it back 2 days later totally fixed at no cost to me. Bravo! I honestly don't know how their service could be improved. Perfection is the goal, excellence will be tolerated.

Well, the MacBook is going back to Mac for repairs. Luckily, it looks like they are covered under warranty. Hopefully, I will be back up and running by next wednesday. Not having the internet is so hard. Its amazing how you take things for granted until you don't have them.

Doh!

Well, sorry. My internet totally took a crap on me. It will likely be a few weeks before I get it back, but I will still try to post whenever I can. I plan on using other people's internet as much as possible. I'm using my in-laws computer right now. (I can't talk right now, we are being watched)

Becks Debut? Running blog

Well, Beckham finally made his MLS debut today. Here is my running blog of the game:

Pregame: Ok, so Becks won't start, but is expected to play as a sub. Regardless of that, the Galaxy need to start winning games if they want to make the playoffs. Imagine, after all the tickets sold and TV attention the team doesn't even make the playoffs. They had better do well in the SuperLiga then.

Starting Line-ups: Ok, who needs Beckham? Galaxy should easily win this game based upon the starting 11's, but will they play organized at all?

Minute 1: Wow, the pitch looks terrible. MLS will be so much better off when teams no longer play in multi-use stadiums. I don't even know how they can dribble on that pitch.

Minute 5: This has nothing to do with soccer, but Julie just made me some homemade chocolate chip cookies. mmmmmm!

Minute 25: I am working on some changes to my template while I watch the game. Why do I feel like I am being subliminally influenced by the new galaxy uniforms?

Minute 28: DC goal. Very poor goalkeeping. Maybe LA can learn from that; put the ball on frame and see if the keeper makes a mistake. Have they even taken a shot yet?

Minute 29: Thinking about Ed. What a lucky guy. A galaxy fan from the get-go. Not only does his team still exist (mine was SJ, but they should be back in a year or two), they will be on TV all the time now in out-of-area places like fresno.

Minute 32: At least they are doing the picture in picture to show Becks on the bench. I felt like I missed so much of the action in the Chelsea exhibition. They just announced the attendance 46,686. Wow. More than the Nationals usually draw at RFK.

Half: I'm sleepy. Should I even watch the second half? This is just really ugly soccer. LA looks like a rec league team. Their organization is terrible.

Minute 50: I haven't seen much Landon Donovan heckling. I hear they were brutal in Toronto this week. Every time he touched the ball they would throw pink streamers at him. HA HA!

Minute 52: Harms just got slammed. That was a stupid foul. Harms just got harmed. Isn't it ironic.

Minute 67: Martino just slid from behind for no reason. Baffling. There must be something between these players. That was shocking. It looked like there was clear intent to injure. The Referee really had no choice there. That is a textbook automatic red card.

Minute 71: They are bringing Beckham in. This is clearly just to appease the fans. The weather is terrible, they are a man down, and there is no way Beckham will help them win this game.

Minute 65: They just cut away from about a minute of play to show Becks walking around in a suit before the game. What were they thinking? ESPN, hire a director who knows how to broadcast soccer. Fire the guy who directed this game. Also fire Eric Wynalda. He is a cunt. That's right. I said it: cunt, cunt, cunt. Luckily, no one is reading this boring post anymore so it will go entirely unnoticed.

Final: Thank God its over. Maybe Becks can teach his mates how to play before their next match. Notes to Frank Yallop: No Organization. Terrible Finishing. Stupid Red Cards. Keep it up and you won't be able to find a coaching job in AYSO next year.

BARCLAY'S ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE

Thank goodness the Premier League starts again in two days. I know none of you care, but you can all go.......... Okay, sorry about that. It has been a long summer of depressingly poor football on the television. Maybe now I can actually watch a game where the tv coverage shows more of the action than the injured player on the bench (was that movie called Bend it Like Beckham or Bench it Like Beckham? I can't remember.) Lots of dramatic story lines in the Premier League. If I have the energy, I might write about some in the future. Even if I don't, none of you will care.

Feeling Crabby

I think the Giants should bring back the Crazy Crab. Who's that? He was a sort of anti-mascot they had for only one season in the 80's. I know they still have the costume; he made a cameo in I think '98, but he hasn't been seen since. They should bring the crazy crab back next year. Why not? the Dodgers have the Crazy Pig.

All this just so I could get in a crack about Lasorda being a crazy pig. Ah, the lengths to which I will go to make Jimmie mad.

Last crab siting:

Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?

BRAVO! There's nothing I love more than seeing someone inexplicably compromise their morals. How did you go from hating to participating? Well, anyway, welcome WOODY.

Ironic

It turns out the FCC is giving some pretty crazy call letters out to broadcasters now. Under the recent indecency crackdown, I'm pretty sure the FCC bans these stations from broadcasting the actual name it gave them. I'm not even going to post what the names are for fear that my mother will come wash my keyboard out with soap! You'll have to check them out for yourself here (check the comments for even more examples). I would love to hear if anyone knows of any others.

Happy Gilmore

Jimmie,
I finally found it!

New Poll: David Beckham

New poll question up today. Check it out. Feel free to comment if you don't like the voting options you are given in a poll.

World Dominaton

Wow. I guess you never really know someone. It turns out that my wife is a communist sympathizer. She has taken over a Soviet sub and is leading a revolution to return Russia to comunist rule. Don't believe me? Fine, here's some photographic evidence. I am willing to swear under oath that this photo was taken on a Soviet sub and has not been doctored in any way.

Who is Ron Paul?

I think I may have found the candidate I will be voting for in the next presidential primary... seriously. I'm not one for soapboxing, but I think everyone should at least check out his website and think about some of the issues involved. I certainly don't agree with all of his positions, nor do I think he will win the next election, but I hope that supporting him will help open some eyes about how needlessly huge the federal government is and how much money and liberty it is costing all of us. RonPaul2008

My Simpsons family portrait

Ever wonder what you would look like if you were in The Simpsons. Now you can find out. You can create your own avatar at simpsonsmovie.com
Here's what Julie and I might look like...

Can I come too?

"Hello there little missy. It seems nobody told you the bandwagon was full. Well, hop on then."
Still poking and prodding, but Julie has authorized me to announce her new blog is up and running. Visit her at julerton.blogspot.com

What the.....?

Very creative... Tunnel House. Maybe if these guys spent less time recreating their Science Fiction fantasies their house wouldn't be getting demolished.

News and Notes

News and Notes:

Julie is tinkering with a new blog for herself. Its not ready yet, but stay tuned for more info later. I am also working on some updates for my blog. I have added a new poll feature on the sidebar. I intend to update the question weekly and am really interested in gauging the opinions of my readers on what I hope will be some interesting issues. This week's is just a silly, stupid poll for the purposes of set-up. I promise better polls to come, and I hope to add more upgrades that will enrich the reading experience very soon. Please vote so I can see how many people will be interested in this feature.

Checklist

Lets see -- Dogs? Check.
All the crap for the dogs? Check.
Wife? Check.
Clothes? Check.
Crap to pick up dog crap? check.
Rental car to hold all the crap? Check.

Well, we finally made it to Fresno. Gotta get going if we want to make this guy's show tonight. Really excited to see more of his work. More news of Fresno to follow. Yes I rented an SUV, and, yes, I am ashamed. Feel free to call greenpeace on me.

US Border Fence Accidentally Built in Mexico

Oops. A US border fence was accidentally built on Mexican Soil. On the one hand, its never good to illegally enter another country and set up what is technically part of a military installation. Mexico has every right to ask them to remove it and seek some sort of damages for the intrusion. On the other hand, this is out in the middle of nowhere. It seems like the respective governments own most of that property and aren't using it for anything other than a border. What real difference would it make to move the fence 6 feet in one direction or another. I think the best solution would be for the US government to apologize and offer to lease the land from the often cash-strapped Mexican government for the going rate in the area. It seems like most of the land in the area is semi-arid farmland. Guessing how much farmland leases for in that area, I would say that leasing the land for maybe even 40 or 50 years would be cheaper than moving the fence. After that time both governments could reassess their positions, so to speak. Plus, Mexico would get some money out of the deal. But, of course, governments don't always do the logical thing. I'm sure this will take a long time to resolve and end up costing the United States taxpayers lots of money.

Slow day on the beat, Officer?

Think people are mean? Think the government is unfair? Just be thankful you don't live in Toronto...

News Anchor Freaks Out

I've watched this several times and I can't figure out if this is staged or real? I'm all for standing up for what you believe in, but aren't there bigger issues to take a stand against. Also, didn't she make the story even bigger than if she had just read the copy as quickly as she could and moved on to the next story. If it is real, I at least have to give her some credit for realizing that there are more important things to report on than PH and having the balls to do something like that. Fight the Power!

Hope for the Future

It looks like some of the best and brightest high school students had a message for the President yesterday.

Survival of the fittest

Ok, so there's this show that I'm totally obsessed with-- Man vs. Wild.
This guy is totally my hero. Anyway, the other day my wife asked me what I would do with my life if I could do anything i wanted. I didn't have an answer, but I just realized that I would probably do what this guy does. Except I don't think I could. Well it turns out I can do one thing he does...we both blog on blogspot.

oops

Sorry about the lack of posts. I have been very busy lately. I know that is a very overused excuse, but this time it is actually true. Anyway, I had to take a few hours off work to take Daisy to the vet after she had a fall today. She broke all 4 bones in one of her little puppy paws. She will be having surgery on Thursday, followed by a few weeks of difficult recovery. The vet gave her some pain medication, so she came home all drowsy today. I did manage to wake her up long enough to show her splint to the camera.

Presidential Myspace

The current President doesn't have one, but many of the candidates running for president in '08 have Myspace pages. Most are very odd and awkward to say the least. Some border on bizarre. Today I will link to Mitt Romney. I think he is the first Mormon on Myspace. The comments section is very odd. Lots of incoherent thoughts and very poor spelling/typing. You can find out his favorite music groups and books, though. I think its safe to say he is the first and only governor of the great state of Mass. to list Brooks & Dunn as one of his favorite musical groups.

Well since you asked...

Furniture by Adam Wall

This guy made us some amazing tables. Check them out here.

A different kind of "Handy Manny"

Some of you may have already seen this, but I was shocked to learn that some customers in New Jersey tuned into the Disney Channel only to find pornography. Comcast was to blame, not Disney. Check out the story.

Taxes

Wow. On my last paycheck I had $729 dollars withheld for taxes, social security, etc. The majority taken out was for federal income tax. In fact, so far this year I have paid more in federal income tax than on any single living expense. I pay more in federal income tax than I pay for rent, transportation, food or health care.

A GREAT SEGUE

So Boris Yeltsin died yesterday... in related news, I have been listening to an indie band for a while now called Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin . I would say that anyone who liked the old Weezer sound might like them, but that doesn't totally define them. They are in SF today and somewhere around LA LA Land tomorrow. I wish I could go, but I have to be responsible and work.

Page Updates

In an effort to make my page more entertaining, I am tinkering with some upgrades and changes. I have added a link to some video in the upper right hand corner of my blog. If you click on one of the images, the video will play at the top of my page. I'm going to try it out by featuring some music I am currently listening to. One warning: I am not responsible for the video content featured. The videos are automatically chosen by google from search terms I enter. I check it as best I can, but don't blame me if some weird S & M video accidently hops up there. Anywho, hope some of you enjoy some music I'm listening to lately.

I don't know if I've mentioned it, but my wife loves The Office. Here's a clip from next weeks episode.

It seems I've come down with a stomach ailment so I'm not sure if we will make it to MCC or not.

MCC

Anyone going to MCC this weekend? I think Julie and I will drive up on Saturday morning.

feel scrambled?

If you're like me, your day was shit. You can only console yourself by finding ways to fit both "your" and you're" into the same sentence. Oh, and by checking out these pictures.

Julie and dogs

Farm Pond Fishing

We had to build a small pond behind our house for irrigation on the farm. We plan to stock it with fish and hope there will be some good fishing out there. In order to give the fish a more acceptable habitat, I designed some structure and put it in. I was hoping to include some pictures, but blogger is being stupid right now. In other news, Julie cut her hair. If anyone comments something like "why didn't you put up a picture of her new hairstyle?" I will explode in a fit of rage. Isn't it funny how technology can make you so angry sometimes. Anyway, she cut off a 10 inch braid to donate to Locks of Love.

Around the World

Sorry about the lack of posts. I have been fishing in Mexico for almost a week. The fishing wasn't very good, and I'm glad to be home. Other than that, I haven't had time for anything other than work, home, pets, wife. Not in that order. Hey, did I just hear that Switzerland invaded Liechtenstein?

Dog Days of February?

Yesterday we got our new puppy! Her name is Daisy, and she is a border collie. We think she is between 6 and 8 weeks old. She came to us from a shepherd with whom the farm does business. I am hoping that she has some herding instincts so that maybe I could learn to work dogs with sheep or even cattle. Daisy and Kota are already getting along pretty well. They both slept in the laundry room last night without any major problems. Daisy is adorably and loves to be cuddled and held by people. Thankfully, Julie had the day off today, and I think she held that puppy almost all day. Daisy has already latched onto her. I was hoping to update my Flick'r account with some pictures, but I seems to be down right now. I guess I will have to post a few here now.

Julie and Daisy on our brand new lawn

Dana, Kota and little Daisy

Kota is still my buddy. I didn't have to drive too much for work today, so he got to spend the whole day with me. That was fun. He is really getting excited about digging in gopher holes, and he falls asleep at my feet every night while Julie and I watch tv.

Update City

As I'm sure you can tell, I've finally switched over. I am actually very happy with the switch because now my mac browser can do all the simple things you all have been able to do for all of eternity. I can change my font, size, color, and many other things. Stay tuned while I blow your mind....

What the ....?

Check this out. winmysoul.com

Woodworking

Ok, so on the farm we are having a bit of a gopher problem. The problem is there are too many of them, and they really mess things up. So we have been trying to get rid of them, with very little success. So I am building these owl houses that will hopefully attract more owls to the area to eat more gophers. I have discovered that I'm not very good at working with wood on anything that needs extreme precision. Granted, I'm not exactly working with professional tools, but I would really like to be able to cut a straight line. It would be great if I cut 6 pieces that fit together in a cube perfectly, with all the edges perfect. No matter how hard I try, I simply can't do it. Needless to say I really admire how hard it is to do what this guy does.

We made it back from our trip. It was a lot of fun. I thought I would include a picture of one of the highlights.

This is actually really cool. Julie got to pet and feed some dolphins. Who can say they've done that?

I Feel Betrayed

Is nothing sacred anymore? The internet is ruining the world. I guess you never really know someone. The other day Julie and I went to Sea World and really enjoyed watching a couple of Beluga whales swim in their enclosure. Now, sure enough, I find out that even they have a sex video! I demand that Sea World take them off exhibit immediately. A family organization like the one that owns Sea World (Anheuser-Busch) cannot be promoting this kind of pollution of our morality. I am outraged!

Playoffs

Charger mania is gripping San Diego. All week there have literally been half a dozen huge Chargers celebrations a various locations throughout the city per day! The game doesn't start until 1:30, and there was already a huge traffic jam to get to the stadium at 7 am this morning. The gates weren't even open yet, but literally thousands of cars were lined up waiting to be allowed in to tailgate.
As for the game, I don't know who will win, but the Chargers clearly have the better team. If you look at it from a matchup perspective, the Chargers win at most positions. It remains to be seen, however, if the Patriots have a game plan to neutralize this disadvantage.
So much has been made of San Diego coach Marty Schottenheimer's playoof record. For those of you who have been in a cave for two weeks, he's got 200 carrer wins (a hall of fame type number), but is only 5-12 in the playoffs with no Super Bowl Wins. Most analysts say this makes him less of a good coach, but I disagree.
Coaches get their teams ready to play on a weekly basis. Great players win playoff games. Schottenheimer has coached some less than great teams into the playoffs, but they simply didn't have the talent to win in the playoffs. Other coaches wouldn't even have gotten some of those teams into the playoffs. To me, this shows that Schottenheimer is a great coach, and I think he has the talent to at least get to the Super Bowl this year.

Woman Dies From Radio Station Contest

Can this story possibly be true? If it is, this may be the most damage a radio station contest has ever done.

If you ever go to San Diego, go to the Bali Hai for dinner. Call and make a reservation for a table by the windows at a time you know will be after dark. Beautiful view. They also are a great value. Julie and I both had drinks, crab cakes, dinners that included soup and salad, a dessert and coffee. I was shocked when I got the bill (in a good way for once). It was the cheapest meal we have had since we left Bakersfield. The food was top-notch, and the service was great too! It was so good, we are honestly considering eating every meal there for the rest of the trip. This place is seriously amazing. It would be worth an expensive dinner for the view alone. Yet the food is also great and totally underpriced for what we have experienced in the city so far. I highly recommend this place.

Also, Julie looked really beautiful tonight, but she always does.

check it out at BaliHairestaurant.com (don't know why blogger won't let me hyperlink right now)

Soccer in America

The big news today is that David Beckham will be coming to MLS and playing for the LA galaxy for a reported $250 million. I don't know how the league can afford it, and I think that it makes some crazy assumptions about how much of the contract will be covered in endorsement money. But I leave all the talk about this to the sports stations; Sportscenter anchors love talking about this just so they can bring up Victoria and show scantily clad pictures of her.
In terms of the international game tapping into the American market, I think there is a much more interesting story. With the news that Clint Dempsey has been approved for a work visa in the UK, EPL team Fulham now has 3 current or former US national team players in their team (I think Brian Mcbride technically retired from the national team after the World Cup). Word has also been out for weeks that Fulham are also pursuing a transfer for US player Oguchi Onyewu who is currently playing in Belgium. The question is, with so much quality talent out there, why so much interest in US talent from Fulham. A likely reason is that they are finding US talent highly undervalued internationally. What they get out of McBride is a steal for what they pay him. Maybe they just are finding that they can get good US players for cheaper than their international equivalents. Then again, the $4 million they paid for the unproven Dempsey certainly seems like more of a gamble than a frugal tactical move. I think its possible that they are hoping to tap into a growing US market for top-tier soccer. There are a handful of cable channels that now regularly broadcast premier league games in the US, and some of the ratings numbers indicate that more people in the US want to watch the EPL than the MLS. Can you blame them? It is possible that Fulham could parlay some of these US national players into a loyal fan following in America. Time will only tell.

Mobile Blogger

Julie and I are visiting San Diego for our anniversary. We just arrived at our hotel and my mobile wireless internet works great. My plan is to blog every night, but I don't know if I will make it. We didn't really do anything today except drive. We packed and left this morning, stopped at the store for a few last minute travel items, and spent some serious time in traffic. We also ate at "Il Fornaio" in Del Mar. I know that this is a chain, so its not like I'm reviewing a local place. The food was good and the view of the sea was beautiful. We had a corner table upstairs in the glass-walled, covered patio. There was a great panoramic view of the sea and coastline. I hate places like Del Mar, though. Everyone is so pretentious. Crazy! Its like a different planet these people live on.

New Year's Resolution

Happy New Year (a little late)! New year's day came and went without much fanfare for me since I went to bed about 9pm on new year's eve so I could get up at 4am to go fishing the next day. My father-in-law and I were in a tournament. We came in 5th place out of 31 boats. In this tournament 5th place payed off, so I won money for the first time ever in a fishing tournament. We almost won back the money we paid to enter the tournament. Anyway, I have 2 resolutions for this year. Sleep more and spend more time with Julie. So far I have been failing miserably at both, but I plan to make up for it soon.

Oh Christmas Tree

Has everyone else taken their Christmas Trees down already? If you had one, that is. We sure haven't. I hope Julie lets me take ours down before June. I took this picture of the tree with the camera in my new computer.

Back in the kick of things

I just did the smartest thing I've ever done in my life. I ordered the upgraded sports pack with directTV. Now I get about 30 sports channels including most of the regional Fox Sports channels, and more importantly Fox Soccer Channel. I have already instructed my DVR to record all Premiership games that come on. This moring I watched Fulham (one of my current favorites to watch) play some tough football to gain a draw against a slumping Chelsea in west London. Its huge for Fulham to get a point on the road at one of the best clubs, and its a huge dissapointment for Chelsea to only get one and lose more ground to Man U. Best of all, I watched it on my DVR so I could fast forward through breaks in the action, set ups on corners, etc. I only hope that I have enough time to keep up with the EPL as much as possible this year.

Will it blend?

have you ever looked at something and thought "I wonder what would happen if I put that in a $825 blender"? Stop what you are doing and go straight to willitblend.com Click on "Don't try this at home," and watch in amazement.

Wireless Blogging

Thanks to my new Macbook Pro Laptop and my brother getting me the new Verizon Wireless Broadband express card, I am now back on the internet. I never thought I would be blogging totally wireless, but I am doing it right now. I feel like a time traveller living in the not so distant future. I know that wireless internet has existed for quite some time, but the speed (or lack thereof) didn't seem practical to me. This new express card is even faster than I thought it would be. Don't get me wrong, Cable broadband is still much faster, but this remarkably close. Now, for all you know, I am writing this anywhere. In my car... in the back yard.. on the toilet... wherever. Just thought I would share my joy with you all.

Happy Christmas Eve

Merry almost Christmas. This has been an exciting week. It was good to see Jimmie and Christina with their son, Dillon. They were nice enough to make time to come by our new place this weekend. Our other exciting news is that we got a new dog.

His name is Koda, and he is a 13 month old aussie-border collie mix. He stays with me all day on the farm, and then follows Julie around the house all night. Later in the evening, he likes to sit at my feet with his bone while I watch TV. Needless to say, we have already gotten very close to him.
Anyway, hope everyone has a very good holiday. I hope to see some of you in Bakersfield on wednesday.

Christmas time update

Ok, ok... so I' back -- sort of. I still don't have internet at home yet, but I am resolute to start blogging regularly again. The move has been good. Looking forward to Christmas. I now have DirectTV. Want to get more channels on that. Hoping to order those soon. I am excited that Simpsons Season 9 is on DVD now. Got it yesterday but haven't watched any yet. Hope all is well with all of you.

I wish peace and joy for everyone this holiday season and for all time!

What is wrong with the American heart?

Our new home passed final inspection and now we can move in. There is still so much work to do and I am exhausted; I honestly cannot comprehend how it will all get done in the next few days. I know it will, though. Posts might be sketchy for the next week while I get moved. Here's something interesting to think about in the interim:

Thursday is the final inspection for our new place. Hopefully, that means we will be in our new home tomorrow night and moving our stuff in on Saturday. Julie gave our 30 days notice to our landlord today. I can't wait for it all to be over. I have been working myself sick (literally) on the house for at least the last month and we have been waiting for this for almost a year. Note to self: call satelite company tomorrow... must have cable TV as soon as possible!

Toot my own horn

For those of you keeping score at home, my weekend predictions can be scored as follows: NFL games: 2 for 2, Freakish Natural Disasters 0 for 1. It seems Dallas didn't implode as anticipated. Oh well, I can always hope for next week.

Turkey lurkey do

Well, our new home in almost done, and I have been doing alot of work myself this last couple of weeks. By the end of the day, I don't even have enough strength in my arms to blog. Yes -- its very sad. Hope to have some pictures up as soon as I can take them. I am very optimistic that the final inspection will happen next week, and hopefully we can move next saturday. This stupid long weekend is causing a frustrating delay right at the end for us. Which makes me think...

Why do we celebrate thanksgiving on a thursday? It seems odd. Some people have to go back to work on friday, and others get a weekend that is, frankly, too long. I understand that this will never change now that friday has become such an important retail day, but I don't think that was originally the case. So does anyone know the original reasoning behind thanksgiving on thursday?

Thanksgiving Football Predictions:
Miami at Detroit
Even Miami can score on Detroits defense, and Detroit can't score on Miami's offense. The only way Detroit gets a touchdown is on a defensive turnover. Its already clear that neither of these teams even has a chance at the playoffs, so who cares. Sleep in and skip this 9:30 game. If you insist on watching, I think taking Miami -3 is a pretty safe bet.

Tampa Bay at Dallas
Of course, the game isn't really "at dallas", since Texas stadium isn't in Dallas. My bold prediction: A freak Texas earthquake implodes Dallas Stadium. Most people escape unharmed. Some minor injuries. Most notably, TO's throat gets hit by falling debris, and his vocal chords must be removed. He can never talk again. Tragically, he hasn't the intelligence to learn sign language, and in a stroke of poetic irony he must spend the rest of his life communicating through interpretive dance.
In addition, his huge contract makes the amount the Cowboys must pay him in workers compensation astronomical. The organization is forced to fold. The Dallas cowboys are no more. Jerry Jones is broke and marries Al Davis for his money. Together they spawn the darkest supervillain the world has ever known.

Denver at Kansas City
This is the night game and, after the tragic events earlier in the day in Dallas, the NFL cancels this game out of respect. Lucky for me, cause this one is tough to call.
Don't worry, by next week they will be saying how the show must go on and the victims would have wanted them to play again as soon as possible. Ok, if I'm wrong and Texas isn't freakishly wiped off the map, KC will roll over the Broncos. I predict they win by at least a touchdown, unless there is bad weather. If the weather is bad, this game could come down to a last minute field goal.

Going to fresno for a couple days while my brother has surgery...

Well, its that time of year again... I have to make a wish list for my birthday/Christmas. I never used to do this -- at least not since I was about 8 years old, but Julie's family has this tradition where everyone makes Christmas lists. Why do I always find it such a terribly difficult task? I have been sitting at the computer for about 2 hours and have only added 1 item to my list. I thought that tossing back a couple of beers would make the task easier. No such luck. Its just making it harder to read. Andw evem harber to typeee;

Personal Updates & Political Rants

Well, I know I haven't posted in a while... I have been very busy. We are working hard on getting our new place finished. I am very optimistic that we may be able to move within a month. I almost got a new (used) truck, but the deal fell through.

I don't know about anyone else, but I don't want to hear another political ad ever again. I don't know how it is elsewhere, but some of the races have gotten as nasty as I have ever seen in bakersfield. Here's what I don't understand: if your 30 percentage points behind the incumbent, why would you sling mud? I can understand a certain amount of mud slinging if its a close race, but if you clearly are going to lose, the only reason to go negative is out of malice.

I'm also sick of hearing about how the Dems are going to take back the house. Not that I don't want them to. I am one of the crazy few who believes that our government works best when neither party holds both the presidency and congress. I feel that this usually leads to the most moderate and reasonable governance. Prediction: The Dems won't take back the house. Sorry, but 15 seats are alot. I just don't think they will get more than about 13. I hope I'm wrong, but thats my prediction. Most of the media polls are looking at overall national sentiment, but you have to look at each individual race. Republicans still have much better voter turnout strategies than Dems.

Whatever happens, I hope that this election brings the country together, rather than polarizing it further. Everyone has their own opinion about the president, but the thing that I will remember most about this presidency is how it divided the nation. Think back with me to 2000... its almost hard to remember, but Bush used to have the reputation as a uniter. People were saying that in the White House, he would embrace bipartisanship and bring the nation together to get things done. If you know someone who said this (I can think of more than one person right now), call them right this second, tell them they are an idiot, and just hang up.

On 9/11 America rallied around the President as it always does in times of crisis. His approval ratings were the highest of any president ever (over 90%). Now, some polls are showing his approval ratings in the upper 30 percent range, and it seems that partisan hostility is at an all time high. Its hard for me to believe that anyone else in his position could have caused more division in the last 6 years.

I hear alot of hopes and fears when people talk about the upcoming election. Hope that a regime change might be enough to bring troops home from Iraq. Fears that a liberal Speaker of the house from California might set a legislative agenda to burn bibles and outlaw all marriages except gay marriages. It think both are obviosly rediculous. My hope is that everyone living in the United States will start seeing people as their neighbors, and stop seeing them as democrat or republican (or, God forbid, an illegal alien). That those in government will spend less time and energy playing hardball to push through their agenda, and spend more time meeting about an agenda we all can get behind. My fear is that everything will stay the same.

Went to the 49er game this weekend. Had fun. Here's a pic.



I want to make it clear that we aren't one of those people who walk all the way up front to take a picture and look like we have good seats. these are actually our seats. I feel there should be a rule that you must take a picture of yourself from where you actually sat at the ballgame. It helps to convey your actual game experience more accurately.

What a difference a week makes

Last week, I left town and it was 95 degrees. When I got back yesterday it was 65 degrees. What a difference a week makes. Julie and I went to Clear Lake for vacation last week. For those of you who are stupid, here's some info on Clear lake. Anyway, I had some pics from the trip that I wanted to post, so I decided to start a new Flickr account. I will still be posting pics on the blog, but if you want to see the stuff that doesn't make the cut or is too random to explain, check us out on flickr. i will also be adding a link on my sidebar. I hope some of you click through and check out the pics from our vacation.

New Car, Just not for me...

Went to Fresno this weekend to see my brother's new car. He got an '06 Mazda Rx 8 Shinka. According to my research, this car was the Car and Driver best pick for the sport coup class. I have to admit that initially I wasn't to sure about him getting this new car, but having seen it, I am very impressed. It handles like I imagine an open-wheel racecar must handle. Perhaps the most distinctive thing about the car is that it has a rotary engine. Thats right no pistons driving this baby! This amazing little 1.3 liter rotary engine puts out the horses of a big V-8 with much less weight and bulk. I am amazed!

Heres some more info on the rotary engine in this car:
Renesis Rotary Engine

Forty years of rotary-engine racing success went into the design of the RX-8’s advanced RENESIS (Rotary Engine genesis – or rebirth of the rotary engine) engine. Incorporating many elements that made the RX-7 the most successful model in International Motor Sports Association (IMSA) history and brought Mazda the 1991 24-Hours of Le Mans overall win, the RENESIS engine is exceptionally well-built and capable. This racing pedigree is evident through the various motorsports series employing the RX-8, including Pro Formula Mazda and the Grand Am Cup.

By turning a triangular rotor in a cocoon-shaped combustion chamber, the RX-8’s rotary engine efficiently performs the four processes of intake, compression, combustion and exhaust. The RENESIS engine is remarkably smooth and high revving — all the way to 9000 rpm — and offers a smaller engine footprint than traditional internal combustion engines (some 60 percent smaller than a comparably powered V-6, and 40 percent smaller than a four-cylinder).

Improving upon 40 years of rotary designs, the RENESIS engine boasts side intake and exhaust ports with nearly 30 percent more intake area and twice as much exhaust area than previous rotary engines. The efficiencies gained through larger intake and exhaust ports exclude the need for forced induction, a feature found on the last rotary-powered sports car from Mazda, the vaunted third generation RX-7.

The RX-8’s normally aspirated 1.3-liter engine might appear diminutive to the untrained eye when compared to large-displacement V-8s or heavyweight V-10s or V-12s. However, through the incredible efficiencies of a rotary powerplant, an advanced three-stage intake system and an electronic throttle, the RENESIS engine delivers smooth, linear power on a grand scale.

The RX-8 benefits from placing the powerplant low and far back in the engine bay in what Mazda calls an advanced front-midship layout, which lowers the center of gravity and improves vehicle balance. In addition, the fuel tank is placed ahead of the rear axle, and all seating is within the wheelbase and track of the car. Combined, these factors contribute to a perfect 50/50 vehicle weight distribution, low yaw-inertia movement and superb handling characteristics. With such excellent balance, it is little wonder the RX-8 feels right at home on even the most challenging race tracks or negotiating a tight freeway onramp.

(From rssportscars.com)

I am deeply concerned...

a very sad story

This is what our country is doing, and I'm not trying to say it is right or wrong, but it is happening right now.

Just thought some of you might want to know, since the mainstream media doesn't seem to want to report it. I know most americans are more concerned about the controversy over the recent Oregon-Oklahoma football game, but this story haunts my thoughts. I understand that there are complicated issues involved and I'm not trying to be preachy (I don't really even have a side on the issue), but the thought that my country would do this to an innocent person deeply troubles me.

Sometimes the problems of the world seem so great that they are insurmountable. But if we really are the greatest nation in the world, surely we can win the war against terror without doing things like this.

"You become a monster so the monster will not break you."

Holding on

Julie holding a nice fish she caught this weekend (left)

Julie holding her new nephew, Ryan (bottom)

Here's a clip of the Sports Guy on my wife's favorite show.

College Football

College football couldn't have come soon enough this year. Seriously, my sanity was hanging by a thread. I guess I never realized the place football has in our society until this year when so many things in my life are upended. Now don't get me wrong, I am insanely passionate about the game of football(see this post), but this year I was impacted not so much by the game itself, but by the place it has in our society.
Somehow, football has become America's new passtime. Just like baseball used to be associated in everyones mind with school getting out, summer days by the pool, 4th of july parties, and sneaking in a few more playoff games before the weather turns cold, so now, it seems, we associate football with the weather turning cooler, the leaves turning color, great fall comfort foods, staying warm indoors with family, thanksgiving, and an overall sense of home and family. Even my wife who doesn't really know much about the game of football commented to me the other day that "when you have the game on it just feels homey in here."
Now, I don't think that football has done something right, and baseball has done something wrong-- Errrr... Well, lets say football hasn't totally screwed itself the way baseball has. That said, I feel much of this shift in national attitude comes from national shifts in population. As our population shifts dramatically from northern to southern latitudes, our national attitude about the seasons changes. No longer do the majority of us celebrate summer as the time when it finally is warm enough to go outside with a tshirt on. Instead, many of us now dread the terrible heat of the summer and look forward to celebrating the end of our misery, fall. And football is lucky enough to be the game that begins just as the miserable heat's grip begins to weaken.
But whatever the reason, football, especially college football, came just in time to save my sanity this year.

Updates

I have updated some of my links and will be trying to update more as time permits in the coming weeks. Heather started off right with a nice pic of JLH! She clearly knows how to get my attention.

How to...

Since I know that I am the happiest, most successful person you know, I thought I should share with you some of the secrets to my success. You see, the key to being happy and getting everything you want in life is in the things you value. If you value the same things as me, you are on your way...
Things I value:

1. Investing Wisely

Just bought this yesterday










2. Celebrating Diversity

These may all be bottled in the US, but they represent international flavor.
Mexico...
United States...
Brazil...
Czech Republic



3. Creativity and Invention

Julie has invented a cake made out of brownies

Well... I guesss thats all I've got. I thought there might be more, but I was wrong. Oh, well. Now you can get started on the road to being just as happy and successful as I am. And no more so!

Got Gas?

I got gas yesterday for $2.99 / gallon. I couldn't remember the last time I paid less than $3. It has to have been at least 6 months. What is everyone else paying for gas these days?

Are two heads better than one?

"If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell"
-Matthew 5:29-30

An Indian man born with two penises wants to get one of them removed so that he can marry, a report said Saturday. Why would he have to get one removed so that he could marry? Did one of them want a different girl or something? If God gives you a gift like that, you shouldn't have to remove one. Instead, you should be allowed 2 wives. If I ruled a country, polygamy would be banned, with one exception. A man ought to only have one wife for every fully operational phallus.

Of course I am totally joking. Two penises would be a terrible curse. Imagine how hard adolescence was for him. Oops, poor choice of words. One the plus side, he could probably put out two separate small fires at the same time, so he had that going for him. But seriously, you know you really love someone when you are going to have a penis removed for them. Although, your perspective might be different if you had a spare.

I'm actually trying to set the new world record for number of times the word "penis" appears on a posting that begins with a bible verse.

Feeling Animalistic

Two animal pictures that seem to capture how I feel today

Earlier today:
"Don't disturb me today... I don't feel good and I just got comfortable. Haven't I put up with enough of your crap this week?"



Now:
"That cake Julie is making sure smells tasty."

money, money, money, money... money

If you are like me, you are short, blue-eyed, typing on your computer, and you have a headache right now. You also may find it interesting to think about the complex interconnectedness of money and politics in this country. On that front, I have recently run across a treasure-trove of fascinating data.

For example: did you know that there was one lonely person in the bakersfield area who donated $200 dollars to Al Sharpton for the last presidential primary (I am assuming it was one person since he only recieved 200 and that is both the maximum single donation, and the most common ammount donated).

Or go to the person look-up type section and find out who MLB commissioner Bud (Allan) Selig gave money to.

Quick Update

So, Julie and I are going to the beach this weekend. Too tired and in too much of a hurry to write something about myself, so here is another video.

Butter Off Dead

Well, I had a busy first half of the week in Fresno and now I am having a busy second half at home in bakersfield.

On a side note, it has come to my attention that my blog doesn't have nearly enough of two key elements. Element one: Amish. Element two: violence. I will try to remedy both right now. Please watch the following video:



Hilarious!

An Open Letter

This is an open letter to whoever reads this about my life and my thoughts right now. I promise I will try to go back to being "not funny" very soon:

It looks like I will be spending some time in Fresno this week. My family is going through some stuff right now, and I need to be there for them. I should be there for at least a few days starting on monday. This is the first time since we have been married that I have gone somewhere and left Julie at home for any more than an overnight fishing trip. She wanted to come with me, but I really feel like she needs to stay here to work and hold down the fort. She has already taken one day off for my family last week, and I feel like taking any more might be pushing it with her work situation. Its not like we haven't been apart. She has been gone on business trips for a week or more at least 3 times, but this time feels different since I am the one who is leaving.

I guess I feel a little guilty. I am leaving my wife home alone, and am leaving her family when things are pretty busy on the farm. But I know this is the right thing to do. My family really needs me right now and that is the most important thing. This is just a microcosm of the major issues in my larger life. If I had to reduce it down to its simplest form it would be this: I try really hard. I try to be the best husband, friend, son, brother, citizen I can be. I try love and honor my wife's family every single day, which includes trying to be the best worker I can be. I try to be fair, just and compassionate in everything I do. I try to live in a way that doesn't cause harm to others. I try to make the world a better place. You might laugh and call me an ideologue, but those are really the things I think about trying to do every day.

The thing is, I'm pretty sure that I totally fail at most of those things about 99% of the time. And I'm ok with that. I know that none of us can be perfect, or even close to perfect. You see, my personal "goodness" isn't important to me out of some sense of ego, perfection, self-righteousness, or other self-focused attitude. Ghandi said that one ought to be the change he/she wants to see in the world. Thats why I try. I guess a different way of putting it would be to say that "I try hard to do right by the people around me." It would be nice if I felt like I was successful once in a while.

Well, all of that to explain how today I got the best compliment of my life. I tell you this next part, not to toot my own horn, but to share with you something that deeply touched me. Today I took my wife to get coffee at 6 am before going to the hospital to see how my brother weathered the night. I was totally stressed and worried about him, my mom, work, life, world peace, aids in africa... you get the picture. I was driving in silence thinking about all these things with a furrowed brow, when Julie looked over at me with a smile and said with total sincerity and no agenda, "You are a good man."

Wow! I care what she thinks more than any person in the whole world. And I can't think of something that she could say to me that would mean as much. She's never said it to me before, and I don't know why she said it, but it made me feel as proud as I ever have and as humbled as I ever have at the same time. I don't know how that happens, but it did. That may be the high point of my life. I hope that you all someday have someone who means everything to you say something like that.
--Dana

More Pics

This weekend we went to the wedding of our friends Mike & Anna. It was fun.

When I saw this bottle, I knew a good time would be had by all. I told them they should hire bodybuilders to poor drinks for everybody, but now I think it would have been funnier to have a small crane lift and poor the bottle.


Look at the pipes on that one.


Henna for Anna


I know this has nothing to do with the wedding, but come on people... My wife is wearing boots and standing out in a corn field. What? Did my friends suddenly stop being mean? I know that can't be true. No one has even made one insulting comment about our hickish, redneck lifestyle.

Well, well, well... so much for my resolution to be a better blogger. Life has really been kicking me in the ass the last couple of weeks, and it doesn't look like it will get much better any time soon. Some random things that have been happening in my life:

-Tomorrow we start picking table grapes. It can be a stressful time. Hopefully, everything goes well.

-I hurt my back a few weeks back, and it was getting progressively worse. I am feeling a little better, though, and I hope that a weekend off the tractor/heavy lifting has done me some good.

-Julie is still great!
This is Julie shucking corn on the 4th of July... Let the jokes begin!

-We were glad to get a chance to see the next great left-handed knuckleballer. Its sad, but he already has more hair and a better tan than his dad. He also already has a bigger ....er.... my wife is hitting me in the back of my head right now! Go shuck some corn or something and let me write what I want.

-Julie and I are tentatively planning to take a little midweek trip to fresno on tues night/wednesday. The intent is to spend some time with my family, but we would love to have coffee or a drink with any fresno people who still care about us.

I thought i would leave you with this really cool picture of a flower that Julie took the other day.


The song I just happen to be listening to right now: Church Clothes by Matt Nathanson

Pictures worth a thousand words?

Sorry I haven't been blogging much lately. Its hot, I'm tired... typical midsummer depression. Julie and I spent some time out on the farm on saturday. Here are some pictures she took.
Here are some grapes that I spend a lot of time with

A nice pic of some blooming Hyacinth and other water plants growing in one of the farm ponds.

Here I am looking totally lame by trying not to get sunburnt
while fishing on the farm ponds.

I will try to take some pictures of our 4th of July party and post them later this week.

Internet Video That Isn't a Sin

Thank goodness someone is as totally obsessed with youtube/ifilm/googlevideo etc. as I am. Check out the Sports Guys YouTube Hall of Fame.

Here is a different link to the video from my last post. I guess some people were having some trouble with that one.

Stupid Person of the Day

Ladies and Gentlemen, I have recently been exploring the idea of starting a peroidic installment of my blog called STUPID PERSON OF THE DAY. Well, today I saw something that sealed the deal. Installment 1:

Stupid Person of the Day




Why is it that CHRISTian politicians never want to put the words of Christ up in public spaces. I would think that something Christ actually said (like the Sermon on the Mount for example) would be at least as important, if not more important, to a follower of Christ than the 10 Commandments. Then again, if you don't know much about either the 10 commandment or the words of Jesus, why would you put you name on a piece of legislation mandating that we put them in public buildings?

Watch out! You may be my next Installment. Or will I be?

US v. Italia

As I'm sure none of you know (except Ed), the US played a world cup match against Italy today. I just finished watching the game and wanted to share with you some of my reflections.


Here are 5 reasons you can like the US Soccer Team:

1. They generally don't beat their wives, take drugs, ride up to the game in their Escalades, hold out for a contract that pays 43 million instead of 42, or take steroids.

2. They don't play soccer for the money or fame. They love the game and so do I. That means I have something in common with US soccer players that I don't feel I have in common with other pro athletes. I honestly don't believe that pro football or baseball players love the game as much as I do. But these soccer guys play it because they love it, and when you hear them talk about it, you can hear the reverence they have for the sport in the voices.

3. They play with heart. If you don't follow international soccer, there is one thing you MUST know to accurately understand the World Cup as it pertains to the US team: the deck is stacked against them! Big Time! We all know that they aren't known as the best players in the world, but if they do poorly, its not because of lack of talent. The whole thing is totally riggged by every other country in the world to make it as difficult as possible for the US to win.
"Why would they do this?"
News flash: Pretty much everyone hates us. Europe and the Middle East hate us for our recent foreign policy. Latin America hate us for our economic policy. And the Far East hates everyone.
Plus, we are pretty much the best at every other major sport, and the world is determined not to let us have this last one. Trust me. This is not a consiracy theory, this is reality. All this to show why the world has totally rigged the whole World Cup against the US. From qualification, to seeding, to scheduling, to referees.
But these players never seem to give up. The worse it gets, the harder they play. I just watched the US play to a draw againts one of the best teams in the world while being blatantly screwed by the referees. These guys have heart.

4. Unlike most professional athletes, these guys are pretty intelligent and well-spoken. The US goalie speaks 3 languages. He recently answered questions in a press conference in fluent Spanish, then German, before returning to english.

5. Brian McBride. This veteran player is tough, smart and motivated. He recently led his Premier League Team, Fulham, in scoring and was voted by the other players as their MVP (I believe this is the first time an american has had that honor in league). He has had some brutal injuries that would have ended the career of most players. I believe he has had his cheek broken twice, and I'm sure some of you saw the injury that he suffered in the game today. Pain doesn't seem to faze this guy. It was like, close that huge gash on my face as fast as you can so I can get back in this game. I was a huge McBride fan before today, but now his greatness in my mind is almost mythical. Let me put it this way: If I had to go into battle with 3 guys: my brother, my high school football coach, and Brian McBride. There are certain people in the world who, when you look at their eyes, show the determination needed to get any job done. McBride has that look, and his play backs it up.

Male Anatomy as a Metaphor

My wife just said the funniest thing I've ever heard come out of her mouth...

Everyone who knows her beware! She just said:

"I just want to tell people to sack-up all the time!"

I spent the next five minutes rolling on the floor laughing. I can totally see Julie's grandma saying the exact same thing if she knew that expression and weren't bothered by the obscenity.

Julie's vulgarity-laden righteous indignation is so freaking hilarious that it might kill me!

World Cup Fever

Sorry for being a bad little blogger lately... I have been working alot the past few weeks. Congrats to Jimmie for successfully getting a girl to sleep with him at least enough times to make this cute little guy.

And now the World Cup has started. I am glad that ABC/ESPN are broadcasting all the games this year, even if I won't see all of them. The last world cup was in Korea/Japan which meant that all of the games were on at like 2am here because of the time difference. I was in college then, and it was summer break, so I stayed up late or got up early to watch as many games as possible. I guess I won't have to do that this time.
The US team plays their first game tomorrow against the Czech Republic at 9 am. My great grandparents came from the Czech Republic, and my grandfather went back there to visit some relatives after the country emerged from communism in the 90's. Perhaps I will break out my bottle of Slivovitz (a plum brandy brewed there) and have a few sips while I watch the US win, or a few swigs if they are losing.
I will be working, so I plan to tape it and watch it tomorrow night. That means I will be going on a total media blackout tomorrow. No tv, internet, or radio all day until I watch that game. Please, do not call me, text me or (if you see me) tell me anthing about the game.
Here's some highlights from the US team's qualifying run to get you pumped up for tomorrow's game. My favorite part is Oguchi Onyewu manhandling the Mexico players. Only someone on that team would be arrogant/stupid enough to get in the face of a guy who's 6'4'' 240lbs.

Mmmm Pie Pants....

I had to work today, so Julie made me a pie...

Good News

Sometimes the news really gets me down. I actually like listening to the news on the radio when I drive to and from work every day, but it can also be pretty sad. If you really think about the people involved in news stories (their emotions, and how their lives are changed) you get a different perspective than if you stay emotionally detached. I often think of that Jack Johnson song that says "why don't the newscasters cry when they read about people who die? At least they could be decent enough to put just a tear in their eye."
Well hear is a good story for a change, and it happens to be about someone I think is a really good person: Dave Righetti.

Finally gets whats coming to him

I can't tell you how long I have been waiting to see this. He got a good punch in too. The most interesting part of the video is when AJ says that they have been friends for a long time. Thats the most blatant lie I have ever heard! 2 things wrong with that statement:
1. AJ doesn't have many (or maybe any) friends.
2. Friends don't get punched in the face.




Thats what you get for mailing it in when you played for the Giants. Plus, it takes a lot to be so hated on that team that they get rid of you. He made Barry look like the model teammate.

I've watched this about 50 times, and it still makes me smile every time I see it. From now on, when I have a bad day, I will just come home and watch this over and over until I feel better.

The bison was right all along

I think this is a funny take on the "immigration debate."
I'm sorry that you will have to click on the link. I tried to get some code to embed the video here, but it was written wrong and I didn't know how to fix it.

Trust me, this video is well worth watching!

Just click the freaking link!
The bison was right all along

Dubya and Libya

If I lost a loved-one on in this tragedy, I would be renouncing my citizenship right now and moving to Canada. I feel so sorry for the people who's worlds were torn apart and now have to deal with this.

Let me set the scene for you as I see it. There is this country with a dictator who organized terrorists to bomb a plane and kill 259 people (many of them American, including 35 college students returning home to Syracuse University). He has harbored terrorist training camps, had the most devious and effective nuclear development program (until the UN paid him $$$ to stop), and is know to be cruel and torturous to his own people.
Based on our foreign policy of recent years, you might think we are planning to invade his country soon. Wrong. We are lifting our sanctions against them as fast as we can, and we are throwing ourselves headlong into becoming best buddies with them (planning to open an embassy there, renew diplomatic relations, increase trade for things like oil).
Trust me, the families of the Lockerbie victims are pissed. Wouldn't you be if you were in their shoes?

Sorry about the downer of a post, but for some reason this just stuck with me all day, and my heart really and truly goes out to all the people touched by this. In my mind, the fact that it happened 18 years ago doesn't make it any less important. All of us who have lost loved ones know that while we may get better at coping with time, we never stop loving and missing those we lose.

High Tide or Low Tide

This is just a great song, and I think this cover does it justice.
Please ignore the idiot who introduces the song (I don't even want to write his name)

Hanging out with my own kind

Sorry I've been such a bad little blogger lately. I have been working really hard (68 hours this week, including 16 yesterday.

One of the fun things about working on the farm is that I see lots of wildlife on a daily basis. There are tons of really neat birds on the ponds around the land that we farm. I check in daily to see how all the little ducklings are doing as they paddle awkwardly behind their mom. I also see squirrels, gophers (the dead ones I trap), jackrabbits, cotton-tail rabbits, skunks, mice and coyotes on a daily basis.
But today I saw something I have never seen before....
I think this is a pretty good picture considering I took it with my camera phone (the screen of which I cannot see in the sun), from about 10 feet up on the top of a water truck tank.

So let me set that stage. I was putting water into a water truck, and I caught something moving out of the corner of my eye. At first I thought it was a squirrel, but as it got closer it looked more like a weasel. I didn't think there were any weasels in the area, and its color was different than any weasel I'd ever seen. I got a great look at it as it came closer. It seemed to be as curious about me as I was about it. It would come out from behind a rock, look at me, then dart behind another rock a little closer to me. Eventually, it was within arms length of me, but he was too quick to let me get a picture of him at close range. Once he got close enough to see what I was all about, he quickly became bored and moved on (I guess women and weasels have a lot in common).
After some internet research, I am certain that it was a long-tailed weasel, which is "native" (not native in the sense that it has always been there, but in the sense that it was introduced a really long time ago and is now a part of the ecosystem without causing too many problems) to most of north america.

I guess they kill lots of small burrowing rodents which is good for us. So I say to my new rodent friend, "Kill on, weasel! Kill on!"

THE SCHRUTE SHALL SET YOU FREE!

So anyhoo... I am a big fan on The Office (the US version, people. the Uk version is so 2002). If you too are a fan, you should check out Dwight's blogs. They are hilarious.
OR... go to his freaking hilarious myspace page!

Another Simpsons Theme

First of all, I know next to nothing about playing the guitar. That said, I believe this is may be the one single instance in the history of humankind where the greatest amount of talent and energy was put toward the most trivial thing.

Rejection

The unhealthy things that single people do to each other...
... are pretty funny.

Not Exactly Seattle Slough

News Flash: I have to admit that I don't know this first-hand. Supposedly, Richie Sexson tried to steal a base for Seattle last night against one of the best catchers in the league, Ivan Rodriguez. This would be funny to see, since Richie Sexson is 6'8"/240lbs and slower than slow. Apparently he was thrown out very easily. Now usually a team would be mad at a player for doing such a stupid thing, but this time they were impressed by his dedication. You see, he was accidently given the steal sign by the coach, and so he tried to steal even though he knew he had no chance.

Anyone who can find me video of this incident will earn my eternal respect and admiration!

Tu Mama

I was just thinking that tv couldn't possibly get any worse. oops...

If you haven't seen this new MTV show called "Yo Momma!"(sic?) you are lucky. It is seriously worse than anything I could imagine. This has to be one of the most embarrassing things our society has ever experienced.
Now, in college, I used to sarcastically tell "your momma" jokes to my friend Jimmie. I was trying to be ironic, though. These guys are totally serious. Everyone on this show qualify for the most pathetic people on the planet, but the everyone who is responsible for making this show should be prohibited from procreation.

My favorite Yo Mamma joke:
"Yo mamma (is) so fat, when she cuts her leg shaving she bleeds gravy."

Please note in my comments if you would like to pledge with me to boycott this show.

You're Beautiful

I visited my brother in Fresno last weekend. He has this huge big-screen HDTV. The picture clarity is nuts! Anyway, we were watching James Blunt live on one of the high def channels. It was startling. Take away his hair, and he looks exactly like my friend Jimmie. I wish I had a good picture of each so you could see for youself, but you will have to trust me.

Home Alone!

In case you haven't heard, Julie is in Colorado for a few days on business. Unless she is having a secret affair with Jay. I don't really think that, just wanted to give his blog a plug since he's done so for me. I do have to say that very few women can resist the jay.

As for me... I just put on aftershave and it really burns. Aaaahhhhh!