Doh!

Well, sorry. My internet totally took a crap on me. It will likely be a few weeks before I get it back, but I will still try to post whenever I can. I plan on using other people's internet as much as possible. I'm using my in-laws computer right now. (I can't talk right now, we are being watched)

Becks Debut? Running blog

Well, Beckham finally made his MLS debut today. Here is my running blog of the game:

Pregame: Ok, so Becks won't start, but is expected to play as a sub. Regardless of that, the Galaxy need to start winning games if they want to make the playoffs. Imagine, after all the tickets sold and TV attention the team doesn't even make the playoffs. They had better do well in the SuperLiga then.

Starting Line-ups: Ok, who needs Beckham? Galaxy should easily win this game based upon the starting 11's, but will they play organized at all?

Minute 1: Wow, the pitch looks terrible. MLS will be so much better off when teams no longer play in multi-use stadiums. I don't even know how they can dribble on that pitch.

Minute 5: This has nothing to do with soccer, but Julie just made me some homemade chocolate chip cookies. mmmmmm!

Minute 25: I am working on some changes to my template while I watch the game. Why do I feel like I am being subliminally influenced by the new galaxy uniforms?

Minute 28: DC goal. Very poor goalkeeping. Maybe LA can learn from that; put the ball on frame and see if the keeper makes a mistake. Have they even taken a shot yet?

Minute 29: Thinking about Ed. What a lucky guy. A galaxy fan from the get-go. Not only does his team still exist (mine was SJ, but they should be back in a year or two), they will be on TV all the time now in out-of-area places like fresno.

Minute 32: At least they are doing the picture in picture to show Becks on the bench. I felt like I missed so much of the action in the Chelsea exhibition. They just announced the attendance 46,686. Wow. More than the Nationals usually draw at RFK.

Half: I'm sleepy. Should I even watch the second half? This is just really ugly soccer. LA looks like a rec league team. Their organization is terrible.

Minute 50: I haven't seen much Landon Donovan heckling. I hear they were brutal in Toronto this week. Every time he touched the ball they would throw pink streamers at him. HA HA!

Minute 52: Harms just got slammed. That was a stupid foul. Harms just got harmed. Isn't it ironic.

Minute 67: Martino just slid from behind for no reason. Baffling. There must be something between these players. That was shocking. It looked like there was clear intent to injure. The Referee really had no choice there. That is a textbook automatic red card.

Minute 71: They are bringing Beckham in. This is clearly just to appease the fans. The weather is terrible, they are a man down, and there is no way Beckham will help them win this game.

Minute 65: They just cut away from about a minute of play to show Becks walking around in a suit before the game. What were they thinking? ESPN, hire a director who knows how to broadcast soccer. Fire the guy who directed this game. Also fire Eric Wynalda. He is a cunt. That's right. I said it: cunt, cunt, cunt. Luckily, no one is reading this boring post anymore so it will go entirely unnoticed.

Final: Thank God its over. Maybe Becks can teach his mates how to play before their next match. Notes to Frank Yallop: No Organization. Terrible Finishing. Stupid Red Cards. Keep it up and you won't be able to find a coaching job in AYSO next year.

BARCLAY'S ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE

Thank goodness the Premier League starts again in two days. I know none of you care, but you can all go.......... Okay, sorry about that. It has been a long summer of depressingly poor football on the television. Maybe now I can actually watch a game where the tv coverage shows more of the action than the injured player on the bench (was that movie called Bend it Like Beckham or Bench it Like Beckham? I can't remember.) Lots of dramatic story lines in the Premier League. If I have the energy, I might write about some in the future. Even if I don't, none of you will care.

Feeling Crabby

I think the Giants should bring back the Crazy Crab. Who's that? He was a sort of anti-mascot they had for only one season in the 80's. I know they still have the costume; he made a cameo in I think '98, but he hasn't been seen since. They should bring the crazy crab back next year. Why not? the Dodgers have the Crazy Pig.

All this just so I could get in a crack about Lasorda being a crazy pig. Ah, the lengths to which I will go to make Jimmie mad.

Last crab siting:

Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?

BRAVO! There's nothing I love more than seeing someone inexplicably compromise their morals. How did you go from hating to participating? Well, anyway, welcome WOODY.

Ironic

It turns out the FCC is giving some pretty crazy call letters out to broadcasters now. Under the recent indecency crackdown, I'm pretty sure the FCC bans these stations from broadcasting the actual name it gave them. I'm not even going to post what the names are for fear that my mother will come wash my keyboard out with soap! You'll have to check them out for yourself here (check the comments for even more examples). I would love to hear if anyone knows of any others.

Happy Gilmore

Jimmie,
I finally found it!

New Poll: David Beckham

New poll question up today. Check it out. Feel free to comment if you don't like the voting options you are given in a poll.

World Dominaton

Wow. I guess you never really know someone. It turns out that my wife is a communist sympathizer. She has taken over a Soviet sub and is leading a revolution to return Russia to comunist rule. Don't believe me? Fine, here's some photographic evidence. I am willing to swear under oath that this photo was taken on a Soviet sub and has not been doctored in any way.

Who is Ron Paul?

I think I may have found the candidate I will be voting for in the next presidential primary... seriously. I'm not one for soapboxing, but I think everyone should at least check out his website and think about some of the issues involved. I certainly don't agree with all of his positions, nor do I think he will win the next election, but I hope that supporting him will help open some eyes about how needlessly huge the federal government is and how much money and liberty it is costing all of us. RonPaul2008

My Simpsons family portrait

Ever wonder what you would look like if you were in The Simpsons. Now you can find out. You can create your own avatar at simpsonsmovie.com
Here's what Julie and I might look like...

Can I come too?

"Hello there little missy. It seems nobody told you the bandwagon was full. Well, hop on then."
Still poking and prodding, but Julie has authorized me to announce her new blog is up and running. Visit her at julerton.blogspot.com

What the.....?

Very creative... Tunnel House. Maybe if these guys spent less time recreating their Science Fiction fantasies their house wouldn't be getting demolished.

News and Notes

News and Notes:

Julie is tinkering with a new blog for herself. Its not ready yet, but stay tuned for more info later. I am also working on some updates for my blog. I have added a new poll feature on the sidebar. I intend to update the question weekly and am really interested in gauging the opinions of my readers on what I hope will be some interesting issues. This week's is just a silly, stupid poll for the purposes of set-up. I promise better polls to come, and I hope to add more upgrades that will enrich the reading experience very soon. Please vote so I can see how many people will be interested in this feature.

Checklist

Lets see -- Dogs? Check.
All the crap for the dogs? Check.
Wife? Check.
Clothes? Check.
Crap to pick up dog crap? check.
Rental car to hold all the crap? Check.

Well, we finally made it to Fresno. Gotta get going if we want to make this guy's show tonight. Really excited to see more of his work. More news of Fresno to follow. Yes I rented an SUV, and, yes, I am ashamed. Feel free to call greenpeace on me.

US Border Fence Accidentally Built in Mexico

Oops. A US border fence was accidentally built on Mexican Soil. On the one hand, its never good to illegally enter another country and set up what is technically part of a military installation. Mexico has every right to ask them to remove it and seek some sort of damages for the intrusion. On the other hand, this is out in the middle of nowhere. It seems like the respective governments own most of that property and aren't using it for anything other than a border. What real difference would it make to move the fence 6 feet in one direction or another. I think the best solution would be for the US government to apologize and offer to lease the land from the often cash-strapped Mexican government for the going rate in the area. It seems like most of the land in the area is semi-arid farmland. Guessing how much farmland leases for in that area, I would say that leasing the land for maybe even 40 or 50 years would be cheaper than moving the fence. After that time both governments could reassess their positions, so to speak. Plus, Mexico would get some money out of the deal. But, of course, governments don't always do the logical thing. I'm sure this will take a long time to resolve and end up costing the United States taxpayers lots of money.

Slow day on the beat, Officer?

Think people are mean? Think the government is unfair? Just be thankful you don't live in Toronto...

News Anchor Freaks Out

I've watched this several times and I can't figure out if this is staged or real? I'm all for standing up for what you believe in, but aren't there bigger issues to take a stand against. Also, didn't she make the story even bigger than if she had just read the copy as quickly as she could and moved on to the next story. If it is real, I at least have to give her some credit for realizing that there are more important things to report on than PH and having the balls to do something like that. Fight the Power!

Hope for the Future

It looks like some of the best and brightest high school students had a message for the President yesterday.

Survival of the fittest

Ok, so there's this show that I'm totally obsessed with-- Man vs. Wild.
This guy is totally my hero. Anyway, the other day my wife asked me what I would do with my life if I could do anything i wanted. I didn't have an answer, but I just realized that I would probably do what this guy does. Except I don't think I could. Well it turns out I can do one thing he does...we both blog on blogspot.